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We see you in the wild and wonderful world of pet parenthood. If you're feeling a little overwhelmed by responsibility to care for another living creature—or know a loved one is struggling under the pressure—this is the piece for you. Take heart with encouragement from our dog parents to yours!
The puppy blues are normal
"Puppy blues" are negative feelings like anxiety, frustration, and even depression experienced by pet parents when they bring a new dog home. (Some people liken it to postpartum depression in parents of human newborns.) These struggles often confuse animal lovers. Aren't puppies supposed to be a source of joy? I mean, they're so cute!
We won't argue for a second that baby dogs aren't adorable. But caring for them can be overwhelming, too!
Last year ManyPets surveyed almost 900 new puppy owners. 70% of them reported symptoms of anxiety or depression. A 2024 Nature survey noted that 45% of their respondents experienced "significant negative emotions" after bringing home their pet. While exact percentages vary for a few reasons—self-reported data is notoriously difficult to trust, the sample sizes were relatively small, and our negative experiences tend to fade over time (an effect specifically noted in Nature)—the conclusion is clear: Puppy blues are common. You're not alone if you're going through them.
The good news? Puppy blues are also temporary. Most dog parents say their worries improve after a few months of adjustment. You can learn more about this and all other things puppyhood in our deep-dive guide, created in partnership with Chewy.
Behavioral "problems" are normal, too
Another experience that makes pet parents feel isolated but is actually common? Behavioral struggles like reactivity, destructive tendencies, resource guarding, and more. A 2019 Journal of Veterinary Behavior paper found that 85% of dogs had at least some behavioral problem. In 2021, Frontiers estimated 72-85%. Multiple factors contribute to these high numbers.
- Our modern human world can overwhelm our canine companions. Dogs have sensitive noses and ears, not to mention their own evolved instincts and social norms. Of course they struggle to fit into society sometimes!
- Movies and TV shows have popularized a mythical image of dogs as pure, saintly, moral creatures. We love the adoration for our four-legged friends—but failing to understand where our pups are coming from can create conflict. Pets are individuals with preferences and personalities.
- Well-meaning dog parents often put their companions in unfair, uncomfortable situations without realizing it. When we don't listen to their signs of stress, small problems can turn into big issues.
It's not "all in how you raise them"
We can't talk about behavioral problems without tackling one of the most pervasive—and harmful—myths in the dog training world. Your dog's behavior is not all in how you raise them! Socialization is important. Ongoing training can teach even old dogs new tricks. But our pets do not come to us as blank slates waiting for our guidance. Genetics and very early experiences (including in utero) affect who they turn out to be.
So if your pup struggles with something? It's not all your fault. You didn't fail. You aren't a horrible pet parent. You might never know the full cause of your dog's personality.
Most issues can be addressed
It is both encouraging and disheartening to learn behavioral problems are so common in our dogs. Good news, though: The majority of issues reported by pet parents can be helped through intentional training, biological fulfillment, and some patience!
We have great influence over our pets
While it's not all in how you raise them, we do have the ability to help our pets grow.
- Good training considers your dog's emotions, innate instincts, current environment, and your own personal goals. We can't fundamentally change who our pups are (any more than we can completely overhaul our friends and partners!) but we can guide their behavior. Healthy compromise helps everyone live a better life.
- Biological fulfillment—often called canine enrichment—can solve so many problems by allowing our pets to satisfy natural tendencies in safe ways. Goodbye conflict, hello harmony! You can learn more about this in our full-length guide.
Some problems aren't really problems
Here's another thing to consider: Is your dog's behavior really a problem for your own lifestyle? (Maybe it is.) Or have you just been told to think so? (This happens more than you might think.)
Some old-school training wisdom can lead pet parents to worry about issues that are actually benign. If you don't mind that your dog begs for food, or loves digging in a corner of your yard, or excitedly jumps on you in greeting—and their behavior isn't negatively affecting anyone else—then there's no cause for concern. You get to decide what does and doesn't work for you!
Every relationship needs a little space
Don't feel bad if you benefit from some time away from your dog. I know, I know—how could I write that in a magazine that's literally about being obsessed with our canine companions?! The truth is we can't take care of our pets unless we take care of ourselves, though. As long as you meet your pup's needs, try to let go of pet-parent guilt that makes you feel like you aren't doing enough.
A personal example: My partner and I routinely hike without our dog even though she enjoys joining us on adventures. Before we leave her behind, we make sure she's had an opportunity to stretch her legs, use the bathroom, and eat—and once those needs are met, we can enjoy our own excursions worry free. Taking a few hours away from her on occasion energizes us to be better pet parents overall.
Your dog doesn't care about specifics as much as you do
This goes for toys, walking environments, the exact length of your training or play sessions... Generally speaking, we humans are the ones preoccupied with outward appearances and arbitrary checklists. Our dogs, on the other hand, have simpler concerns. They want to spend social time with their loved ones. They want to explore their surrounding environment. They want to move their bodies and play!
They don't log every trip they've ever taken, every bone they've ever eaten, or if last month's new toy was better than this month's. They don't care about the scenic summit view more than they value the hike up.
So if you enjoy sharing the latest treats and enrichment gadgets with your pup or visiting awe-inspiring tourist destinations? That's wonderful! But if those things bring you more stress than joy, let it go. Playing with a worn out toy in your own backyard is probably plenty. What matters most is that you have fun, together.
If you care enough to want to be a better pet parent... chances are you're already a great one
Bad pet parents don't lie awake at night worrying if they're doing right by their dogs. Trust us on this one. You're doing a wonderful job.
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